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Showing posts from November, 2013

You-turn.

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Allah tidak melihat pada permulaanmu, tetapi pengakhiranmu.

Sometimes when I sat silently and muhasabah myself. I was thinking, why I hijrah masa dulu? Im wondering what's my point? Am I sincere? "Lala... are you sincere with yourself?" that unwanted voice came out of the blue, haunting me that moment. I was crying. I really disappointed with myself. If I really changed, why cant I leave my bad behaviour? Why Im still committing the same sins? Why cant I forget what I've done? And why lala... why, you're still looking at your past photos and you were thinking of being like that again..?

And I stop. This is...
What I dont want to happen. I dont want this hijrah! I dont want to dressing labuh-labuh macam ni. I dont want to such a very veeerrry gewd girl! This isnt Lala. This isnt ME! This is wrong, wrong step. Im not sincere. Well I was being culture shock since I entered university of doing foundation. I saw all women were wearing hijab, and I was only one girl wh…