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Showing posts from 2014

If you want to be safe

Dari Anas bin Malik radhiyallahu ‘anhu bahwa Rasulullah shallallahu ‘alaihi wa sallam bersabda,


إِذَا خَرَجَ الرَّجُلُ مِنْ بَيْتِهِ فَقَالَ: “بِسْمِ اللَّهِ تَوَكَّلْتُ عَلَى اللَّهِ، لاَ حَوْلَ وَلاَ قُوَّةَ إِلاَّ بِاللَّهِ” قَالَ: « يُقَالُ حِينَئِذٍ: هُدِيتَ وَكُفِيتَ وَوُقِيتَ. فَتَتَنَحَّى لَهُ الشَّيَاطِينُ، فَيَقُولُ لَهُ شَيْطَانٌ آخَرُ: كَيْفَ لَكَ بِرَجُلٍ قَدْ هُدِىَ وَكُفِىَ وَوُقِىَ

“Jika seseorang keluar dari rumahnya lalu membaca (zikir):

Bismillahi tawakkaltu ‘alallahi, walaa haula wala quwwata illa billah 
(Dengan nama Allah, aku berserah diri kepada-Nya, dan tidak ada daya dan kekuatan kecuali dengan pertolongan-Nya), 
maka malaikat akan berkata kepadanya: “(sungguh) kamu telah diberi petunjuk (oleh Allah Ta’ala), dicukupkan (dalam segala keperluanmu) dan dijaga (dari semua keburukan)”, sehingga syaitan-syaitanpun tidak boleh mendekatinya, dan syaitan yang lain berkata kepada temannya: Bagaimana (mungkin) kamu boleh (mencelakakan) seseorang yang telah diberi petunju…

We're all broken. Just at different stages of repair.

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I'm not tired. Im just done. So I leave things aside. Au revoir, x

What I do during midsem break?

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Staying at home could be probably the best vacation during holiday.
I have to finish watching The Walking Dead all seasons and patiently waiting for a new season 5.
Fixing my blog entirely and posting what I have missed since Ive been gone.
I enjoyed reading. I've got two presents given by my friends which they guys gave me a book, "Surat Cinta untuk Kekasih Imaginasi" from Haiyat and "Aku terima nikahnya (kompilasi)" from Peegee. Whatta? hahahha they all have been crazy but anyway a ton of thankies I gave to them because you know I loved books, I am a bibliophile hehe.

So it seems like I'll fill in my holidays by reading.

Futhermore, playing games which I feel like I cant stop playing Candy crush but dont think Im addicted on it, not yet hehe. Im at level 40 now so terrific and stuck and let me know if you guys are playing it too then I could seek your help haha.

Lagi apa? and heyy, please let me know if you have any best songs and you could share it with …

Since I've been gone

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Hello, Im back. Are you still remember me? heh. Im sorry I have to private my blog for awhile because Ive got an intention to delete all my past photos which were still attached on this blog. Yknow, that i dont have a courage to delete it all. It is hard for me. Been thru two years but still Im not that strong. I feel like i lose something, feel like i lack of something i want hmm. If i could get someone who really care for me i would have do it, easily.



Students' life is terrific.

I got myself been through hardships doing assignments, i didnt spend myself in my own room but hvng discussions outside till late at night. I wont give up. It is my responsible anyway..






Alhamdulillah, my motive when I terminated this blog is, to prevent someone from stalking until s/he knows about my past and to take a short time for me to clear all the past photos. I made it. Thanks Allah for gimme a courage to do it. Nawaitu for Allah. Enough, what past is past. Do not try to bob up and down about t…

When I'm Out From Under

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It is my last day today at home before I'm going back to my university, UPM. Everything has done. I dont know Im being so heartless this moment. Something has just went wrong and I couldnt help myself with it. I'm out. And I feel like I want to end this, stop myself from chasing something I dont think it belong to me.
I'm out the line.

So let just being someone new.
My heart will be unbroken, it will open up to everyone. Even when I cross the line, its like a lie I've told a thousand times. Last night, before sleeps, I finally did tawbah prayer (the prayer of repentance) because I cant sleep that moment. I was thinking deeply, plus ton of emotions hit me so hard that night lagilah. All I can do is, crying. Seeking for something.

Screw everything, I feel like done.

I dont want to be that stupid, I have pride and not gonna lose my dignity to any men out there. I just can't trust them somehow. So how am I gonna fall in love if I dont even trust them? I try to trust thi…

Love of ours

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Untuk dia,
yang paling sayang
seikhlas hati.




Dan moga dia juga, yang menyayangi aku kerana cintanya pada Allah.

Niat yang baik, moga disertai dengan Lillahi Ta'ala Moga Allah satukan dua hati, suatu hari nanti.

Tags challenge about myself

basics 1. name: just call me, lala.
2. birthday:  august 29th
3. favourite color: pink, white creamy
4. lucky number: 8
5. height: 159cm, weight: 50kg
talents 1. last dream you remember: i dont know.. it maybe about chocolate?
2. can you juggle: a bit
3. art/sports/both: Art, im not good in sports lol
4. do you like writing: yeah its alright
5. do you like dancing: I do, but I can’t dance very well lol
6. do you like singing: I love it!! I can’t sing either, but I will sing at the top of my lungs if I hear a good song


fantasize 1. dream vacation: Anywhere i guess.. maybe to somewhere i can stay peacefully with my love one
2. dream date: Something simple, talking would be enough cuz I dont do date thingy
4. dream wedding: Not too fancy, not too luxury cuz I wanna spend much money on marriage
5. dream pet: I really want a guinea pig that have a spiky hair
6. dream job: I want to work as a Journalist ofcuz


music 1. favourite song: Whatever will be by Vanessa Hudgens, Jatuh by Estrella, …

Despite the peace

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Nampak tenang pada zahir. Pada hati tah siapa tahu. Punya sekeping hati yang mudah untuk terguris, sekeping hati yang belum mencapai tahap mencintai Ilahi melebihi apapun, tapi secara perlahan-perlahan diri ini cuba memupuk dan membajanya jauh di sudut hati. 

Sebab dah penat jadi jahil, sebab tu cuba kembali pada fitrah. Menjadi baik. Alhamdulillah thanks Allah kerana telah menutup segala aib dan kekurangan ini sehinggakan orang-orang yang baru mengenaliku menyangka aku memang seorang yang baik, dari segi penampilan yang kelihatan seorang muslimah dengan bertudung labuh sopan tatacaranya. Alhamdulillah segala aurat dijaga dengan baik. Nampak macam solehah namun masih merangkak mencari tarbiyyah dalam diri. Setiap manusia pasti akan melakukan kesalahan, aku juga begitu, tak lepas. Tak lari dari sentiasa tersilap malah rasa semakin teruk diri ini. Paling susah, nak jaga batas pergaulan. Failed. Paling bodoh apabila aku menyakiti orang-orang yang baik dan menyanjung orang-orang yang tida…

Saat terluka

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Ada masa masa memang aku rasa gampang tahap macam apa hentah.

Kau tahu mengapa?

Aku dah terbiasa luka berdarah
Hati aku dah mula ranap
Sayap aku hampir patah
Rasa aku mahu punah
Aku ingin segera lesap

Saat aku terlupa yang aku ada Tuhan.
Saat aku terlupa yang aku masih punya iman.
Jadi terus terus aku begini.

***

Mungkin kebencian telah menang meragut hati mudanya
Lalu dia menjadi buta mencari cinta di sisi kanan kirinya
Ditepis-tepis benci disuruh pergi

"Tuhann rangkullah dia. Tengok-tengokkanlah jiwanya yang sudah lecur itu. Pasti bisa Tuhan sahaja yang mampu ubati ". - reblog via gadispianist (credit)

Only people with long hair can understand the problem

Long hair problem. I experience all those! Haha. It is hard to keep a long hair, and especially to those who have had curly and coarse one. I wasted a lot of money to my hair. Using a lot of shampoo everytime I washed my hair and bought hair products such as serum, conditioner, hair mask and vitamins. Yup, hair is what I obsessed. Very. The last time I cut my hair short when I was 16 years old and after that, I kept it long but I did trimmed my hair into V-curve at the end when I was 18 years old. Okay, you guys cant imagined how long and creepy is my hair right now in addition it is hard for me as hijabi.

// That moment having a long hair and people may scream because they thought you are a ghost. Grr, I have ever experienced that before when my dad and my brother scream when they saw me and then when I asked them that I want to cut my hair they forbid me from doing that, hey whats the matter?!

That is why I put a name as "Ghostgirl" on twitter - It's because of my hair…

Doubt every feelings

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It won't be that easy. If it's easy, it is not a love but lust. I doubt every feelings that hit me, because sometimes it doesnt feel true. But this time, I hope it is true. It is the right one. I always hope so before this but i dont deserved   I just dont want to be hurt and hurt. I'm scare. Scare about my thoughts. I would try to forget everything before and never look back. I always trying to be good and make good.  I hope everything is going alright in shaa Allah. If I really found something better, I just wont simply let it go. I won't. I would chase what is belong to me. 

Take time... I will put my faith entirely to Him. And I shall fix my relationship to God first before I step into another relationship. Allah's willing..

Doushite kimi wo sukki natte shimatandarou?

Insert a search box with customization

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STEP 1: For Simple Template user, copy the code below between <b:skin> xxx </b:skin>
For Classic Template user, copy the code below between <style> xxx </style>

<pre>#cookies-search-btn { font-size: 11px; letter-spacing: 1px; font-family: times new roman; font-style:italic; text-transform: lowercase; color: #c6b171; } #cookies-search-box { border: 0px solid #888888; background: black; margin-top: 5px; border: 0 none; width: 140px; font-size: 11px; letter-spacing: 1px; font-family: times new roman; font-style:italic; text-transform: lowercase; text-decoration: none; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; } </pre>
dont forget to remove <pre> & </pre> up there
STEP 2: Copy this code to anywhere you want to put it on your blog. Example on your sidebar or navigation. Well i put it on my navi.

<pre><form action='/search' id='searchthis' method='get' style='display:inline;'> <!-- Search box for b…

Daily Photographs

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I just want to express the photos that I had captured today. Yup, I'm practising to capture some photographs with varies angles. I know my photos still need to practise a lot. // So my family and I went to have a break-fasting at the town.










Because just being a friend are lots of messier

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I don’t think people love me. They love versions of me I have spun for them, versions of me they have construed in their minds. The easy versions of me, the easy parts of me to love. Who’s going to love the girl that can’t stop crying? The girl that hurts herself? The girl that is losing control? The girl that is so sad she can’t get out of bed? The girl that keeps pushing everyone away? Who’s going to love the monster in me, who’s going to love me now?

Because you can never go from going out to being friends, just like that. It’s a lie. It’s just something that people say they’ll do to take the permanence out of a breakup. And someone always takes it to mean more than it does, and then is hurt even more when, inevitably, said ‘friendly’ relationship is still a major step down from the previous relationship, and it’s like breaking up all over again. But messier. — Sarah Dessen
Love is always a good thing no matter how much it hurts. Even after it’s over, even through the pain, anyone …

Blame me for being so lame.

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Its been too long i didnt post about my thoughts here plus i dont know how to start typing but i think it's safe to say here.

Blog is the way I spread out what's inside my heart. I really think that Im such a loser. Its all came from me. Its all my fault. What had happened to me is because I was the one who started it. I dont realize that I changed inter and outernally. To be honest from tudung labuh (long veil) to the tudung bawal biasa. Yep, dont be so surprised.

People make mistakes. One day we will realized by committing a mistake is the common way of life that can mature us. Learn from the mistake. The reason why I changed because I couldnt bear of what people talked about me. Their mentallity thought that tudung labuh must be perfect 24 hours by not making mistakes. Thats why, i avoid by wearing it BUT Im still in the class of covering aurah in shaa Allah.

I hope people wont get misunderstanding with me. Im a human. I made mistakes everyday, comment me but not too muc…

A story of my Hijrah

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Assalamualaikum my readers, hi  I am reaaaally sorry of my promises to talk about My Hijrah. I also receive faq about this from families, friends, cyber buddies and strangers. Now, I am ready to blog. Its hard for me to explain by face to face and keep re-explaining. So, let this blog be a connection. First people who knows about my hijrah is Farahin, that one girl of ex-asperian that I didnt close to her langsung but I trust her. Second was my mum and third, was my team (girls) during charity programme while playing true and dare. I chose "true" thats why lah haha. Thats all yang tahu. This is because I'm afraid and I dont think people would believe me.

F.A.Q How did you change?How did you istiqamah?Why did you turn from the real you?How did you get the hidayah?... and etc that related to.
Bismillahirahmanirrahim.. based on what I blog here, just sit, relax and think deeply. There is no cheat and penipuan (lying) here. Its up to you whether you wanna believe it or not. I…

My semester result of sem 1 and 2

Dean Listed.
It was a depressed moment when i got a low pointer for the first semester and i felt like i failed! That was the lowest pointer that I could achieve. Calming myself. I thought that this second semester would be drop as followed by the first sem. So last night the semester result are released, officially. Like how many times i pray to God that i would achieve the best one. And surprisingly, i cant believe that i am in dean-listed! Over 3.5. Alhamdulillah all praise to Him. Im so excited, like for the first time haha. A good news for me from Allah. He always cheers me up so i wont be sad all the times. My bestfriend also is in dean-listed. I'm happy to all student who attained the best result and for those who are unsatisfied with their pointer, dont be sad. I know how it feels and I ever been there before as i told you. You know, both Failure and Success are gifts by Allah. He wants you to learn, to be the great one. So, dont lose hope. Alahh as long as you are student…

So broken

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Biar gambar berbicara. Today aku log in facebook, and suddenly aku ternampak sesuatu yang menyakitkan sehingga berderai air mata aku. Sangat sangat aku menangis sampai sembap mata ni. Allahu, aku baring untuk tenangkan fikiran menunggu sehingga masuk waktu asar. Dan ketika sujud lagilah mengalir air mata aku, memohon doa untuk dikuatkan hati ini. Selepas tunaikan solat fardhu, aku baring semula dan mencapai phone untuk whatsapp sahabat-sahabat aku meminta pendapat. Aku tiada niat langsung untuk menunjukkan kesedihan aku depan sahabat...


Status pada wechat. Sungguh aku bencikan perbuatan dia. 






Jadi begitulah kesudahannya... walau sakit sekalipun, aku tetap kena gagahkan juga hati ini. Aku kan kuat, mana boleh mengalah. Allah ada berjuta kekuatan yang boleh Dia berikan padaku. Ya Allah, aku mohon perlindunganMu daripada maksiat dan zina. Aku tak ingin lelaki seperti itu, mungkin inilah yang kau ingin tunjukkan padaku bahawa dia memang tidak baik bagiku. Dia tetap sampai bila-bila pun ta…